Some of the Prophet's female companions accepted their husbands' so a women needs to have her money for herself in this case and if the husband dies and leaves her nothing. How could the Intel 4004 address 640 bytes if it was only 4-bit? As I already stated, there is nothing wrong with seeking help from one's wife or the wife offering financial help to her husband as long as it does not become routine and an expectation. Spending on the fathers maintenance is only obligatory if The wife should be comforting towards her husband in times of stress and crisis. a wealthy man, a generous wife may choose to accept very small mahr, but this You are, as a husband and the head of the household, expected to spend money on the basics (clothing, food, shelter) for your wife (and children if you have them). Any recommendation. If the wife does have genuine I would never ask for anything more then he can afford. I should have known you would have come back at me. Awf ibn Malik narrated: We, nine, eight, or seven men, were in the company of the Messenger of Allaah and he said: Why do you not pledge allegiance to the Messenger of Allaah?" The responses on this and many posts reveal that there are some people who just want to stick to what's legalistic, and some who would combine it with a higher intention. If her father sells a real estate, he gives its price to her brother and does not give her anything because he considers himself not responsible for his daughter after her marriage. There are many stronger ahadith and indications from the qur'an supppirting the opposite. Likewise, it is not permissible for the wife to continue working when doing so negatively affects the interest of her family and causes more harm than good. I wish more men would understand this concept. Her refusal is not considered a valid reason in the Sharee'ah for divorcing her. .in the age of Umar, may Allah be pleased with him, a lady, Al Shafa bint Abdullah Ibn Abd Shams, was assigned the position of official business transactor/manager of the market of Medina. He never mentioned this bit I feel that his anger towards them is relaying to me and am loosing hope everyday Find out what your responsibilities are as husband and wife. However, if she does so out of affection towards her husband, she will be rewarded by Allah (SWT). PI cutting 2/3 of stipend without notice. to spend on his own maintenance and that of his wife and family. How about a detailed answer of HOW they should divide their finances depending on how much he has available in terms of house-hold expenses, food, children (i.e. We are one ummah. There is nothing wrong with a wife expecting her husband to financially take care of her! is no obligation to spend on them, because the condition is not applicable They don't split 50/50 with cooking or looking after kids. It would be better if you can keep your generalizations to yourself. sin? If both wife and husband work ..you both contribute! The husband has no right over her financial issues. If the husband has a profitable income, he will provide everything of the best quality, but in a time of financial crisis, the wife, without any complaint, is advised to live with whatever the husband provides. There are so many people in the world who looks religious ,talk religious but when money matter comes they won't compromise .It is not only from the man side(like dowry) even you will see women seeking divorces due to husband's poor financial conditions . Answer All perfect praise be to Allah, The Lord of the Worlds. Just them being strong shouldn't be the reason. a living. living from a suitable job, then his son is not obliged to spend on him, It is not permissible for the husband to take anything of his wife's wealth except what she gives willingly. He ruled that she should be paid according to the Nobody is forcing you to do something you don't want to. Yusuf Ali: For divorced women Maintenance (should be provided) on a reasonable (scale). duration of which must be specified, fixed by the man and agreed by the wife. The wife should take advice on gold (quintar) for a dowry, you shall not take the least bit back.' Tough financial situations calls for tough choices. It would be nice if you could perhaps concentrate on giving your advice and perspective to the OP directly, instead of giving your opinion by criticizing other people's comments, or should I say, other women's comments in a pretty rude way.Forgive me if this is not true, but to me it makes you come across as more of a misogynist then the other person as a feminist. so this right is left entirely to the wife and the wife shouldn't take this right lightly. So I say to my wife I can pay all bills rent food etc and you can cook everyday for me clean the whole house or we go halves on rent and bills and we both cook and clean which is fair. 5 yrs of sincere work has paid this way that he now expect me and threatens me to pay for not only basics but luxury too otherwise the marriage will break. and challenged him, quoting the verse 4:20 from the Qur'an: 'But if you decide Amy that's is typical women perspective, crying wolf has no place in Islam or solving this problem. . Why are lights very bright in most passenger trains, especially at night? They pay rent $170 dollars a month. he 'got away with it' on this earth. A real Muslim man would not marry someone so weak and dependent. If the husband has a profitable income, he will provide everything of the best quality, but in a time of financial crisis, the wife, without any complaint, is advised to live with whatever the husband provides. Rust smart contracts? That is instructed to whoever should believe in Allah and the Last day. Did COVID-19 come to Italy months before the pandemic was declared? After that my husband kept throwing it back in my face if I asked him to pay. Prophet. I was one of them. But she should be ok if husband wants to downsize and move to a not so good neighborhood if HE came under financial pressure and wants to get rid of loans. Because im sure he has already found a new wife for himself in Saudi arabia, women need to work too to live an ideal life . Tell him that if he does not send you more money, you will find yourself a new husband. In fact, many families who marry their daughter are expected to pick up the tab financially and provide ridiculous gold (usually 24 karat) gifts for every female relative of the bridegroom--and even after marriage, some even send their daughter-in-law back home to the mother for the birth of the child and to avoid having to pay for any medical expenses. All rights reserved. The Shafi 'I school rules that a If your ex-husband had this attitude then that doesn't mean every men would be thinking along these lines. It is not permissible for the husband to take anything of his (Ibn Also it will not be the step dads responsiblity to pay for my kids. You don't know me or my life or what kind of marriage I had. I am offended by what you said. It seems like you need to know much about your responsibilities towards your wife. The husband is obliged to share his wealth with his wife and children of his nuclear family. Allah says, regarding a newly divorced woman: House them as you house yourselves as is available. If this is for the divorced woman, then the wife who is under the marriage contract is worthier. But since you didn't have anything substantial to say, and clearly you don't disagree with any of my points, I believe the OP has his answer. Thank you for the personal attack. Although I know I did it out of love and trust and now I've lost everything and am financially suffering. Raw green onions are spicy, but heated green onions are sweet. Allah does not charge a soul except [according to] what He has given it. that she manumitted a slave-girl without taking the permission of the This form May Allah guide us all and help us towards the unique solutions best for our families, Ameen. If the wife has genuine grounds Jurists have different views on what the minimum amount should To provide appropriate housing within the means of the husband, any thing beyond his means is not a right. Allah commanded: 'Give women their faridah bride gifts of money or property, or paying for an enormous wedding feast, or Are my stepsisters feelings and actions justified? to her marriage). It is not also permissible for the husband to compel his wife to work outside the home. Women should understand this really well too. Can I ask her where she spends her money? You are incorrect in much of what you say. we need to wake up and quit living in a vaccuum. Once you pronounce divorce you still have to live and provide for them till their term ends. Marriages are where you conceal each others flaws, and its not always a 50/50 relationship. Scholars differed whether the father should fairly and equally distribute gifts among his children or not. Men should understand this really well. It is not permissible from the viewpoint of the Shari`ah that the husband accepts the wifes working conditional on her sharing in the household expenses or giving him a portion of her salary. She gave her wealth to Rasulullah Sallallhu Alayhi Wasallam. I want to know why in Islam a wife has to obey her husband. Like myself for incidence, I know my rights as a wife, but I pay for certain bills etc,..buy groceries as well. Ali informed the Prophet that he had nothing to give her. This is a financial right, and includes: food, drink, clothing, and other basic needs. Nice to hear the term Taqwa here but unfortunately difficult to find people with taqwa .Because of this reason marriage looks like Money Buisness ..If you have money then i am yours else i have right to take divorce . Stack Exchange network consists of 182 Q&A communities including Stack Overflow, the largest, most trusted online community for developers to learn, share their knowledge, and build their careers. People in my community blame me for my hubby ripping me off financially. Who gave everything for her husband and in the end only got abused by him. However, he is only required to satisfy their needs and not their desires. Wife Asking Husband How Much Money He Owns - Islamweb - Fatwas That's why said I don't want another man to take advantage of me and rip me off as I have kids to feed. position to evaluate the situation as you are living with him. Must I attend my cousins wedding if he molested me as a child? Which men are best? A husband is required to financially take care if and maintain his wife, daughters and sisters, and mother if she is a widow. to keep [within] the limits of Allah . A.aleykum i am married and after two months of married my husband travelled to saudi for work.I am now staying with my parents.Every end month my husband sends me money for my basic needs but its too little.As you know staying with my parents i have to contribute in paying some bills but thats not enough..so how can i tell my husband to give me more Faiza, just ask him. Her right upon him is that he should spend on her according to reasonable terms and according to his well-being, based on what Allah has blessed him with without extravagance. We also use third-party cookies that help us analyze and understand how you use this website. Maybe this sister is being unreasonable by being secretive or dishonest (or perhaps she just values privacy more than most would find comfortable in a marriage), but her husband coming at her with his "boss" pants on is not going to be a fitting longterm solution. Any recommendation. guilty. . case the marriage breaks down and the couple come to consider a divorce - Tweet In Islam, greater financial security is assured for women. Your obligation as a husband in Islam is to provide your wife with food, shelter and necessities. conversions to Islam, or memorising of ayat of the Qur'an, or giving education I don't care about money. Allah (SWT) has recommended we live a frugal life and not be deceived by the temptations and desires of this world. 6 Hide this Adshare Report bad ads? nor when Please help me. 'the best woman is the one whose mahr is the easiest to pay.' My wife threatens to leave me because I am not well-settled, My husband disrespected my parents and they are now demanding khula. Does husband have to pay Mahr if wife does not want to continue marriage but does not ask for Khula either because she does not want to give Mahr back. Marriage is about reciprocity, subject to the financial obligations which lie on the husband only. Furthermore, you may be able to get a good job and support your husband financially too, therefore easing his burden and God forbid if anything was to happen to him you could stand on your own two feet. The main issue I see is that you expect your wife to both give you money and spend money on items that may be your responsibility. 130599. As for useless for women to work, I hope such people don't complain when there are female doctors for their wives, daughters and mothers. I don't want to neglect my kids again for another man. So these responsibilities cannot be divided as you have mentioned here, at least not Islamically. They just dont want to work. Had such gifts been a recommended sunnah, he would surely have given the others I might be making a general statement, but I think most wives would end up losing respect for their husband if he expected his wife to spend money she earned on him--and the balance in the marriage would be ruined. So he preached them and ordered them to pay alms. Today we are living in a consumer society; everything has its own value, and money is the medium of exchange. The wife has no financial responsibility towards the husband or the family. Allah (s.w.t) says: "Men are the protectors and maintainers of women, as Allah has given some of them an advantage over others, and because they spend out of their wealth (on their women). I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allaah, and that Muhammad is His Slave and Messenger. If the wife is earning, she can spend her wealth accordingly without any guilt of not contributing to the family expenditure, as Allah (SWT) has not commanded her to do it. I gave him my experience to give him an insight into a what could happen and what is happening around us. He has 2 other sons (22,25years old), one is married and my husbands father has 2 twin daughters (14 years old). Other uncategorized cookies are those that are being analyzed and have not been classified into a category as yet. [Editor's note: If you require advice, please log in and submit your question as a post for publication rather than as a comment on an existing post; it can then be answered in turn, inshaAllah.]. The Prophet (peace be upon him) said: The best women who have ridden camels are those of Quraysh. How to resolve the ambiguity in the Boy or Girl paradox? How to install game with dependencies on Linux? Women in Islam have been given more financial security, as compared to the men. Why is it better to control a vertical/horizontal than diagonal? Allah required the provision to depend upon the circumstances of Answer Contents Related Praise be to Allah. I agree there are women who are selfish. Frankly, I don't know where you want to go with this. But opting out of some of these cookies may affect your browsing experience. The Prophet If the husband is struggling why wouldn't a dutyful wife not help? 1) In the west if you get a divorce a woman can ask for half of the assets. various gifts when she married Ali b. Abu Talib, but there is no record of his The Prophet (peace be upon him) was asked: Which women are the best? he answered: The one who pleases him when he looks at her, obeys him when he asks something of her, and is not disobedient in herself or her money in what he hates.. Consider Khadijah (RA), one of the most successful businesswoman in Arabia. Quran 4:20 But if you want to replace one wife with another and 2. immediately, but did not do so. to take a wife in place of another, even if you had given the first a heap of To ask her to do something which falls into her personal affairs, such as asking her to give him money or forbidding her from speaking to a friend for no good reason. Allah has given us these rights! narrators) Muhammad. I rest my case "whether you Agree" with Prophet (peace be upon him), as a Muslim is not whether you agree or not [as a Muslim you must] so I will quit argue with you period. In this line it's in with the wife right to refuse, if she want's to: but on next line "She should consider the benefit and harm of such obedience." Can i ask my money back from her or her family (wali)? A woman immediately stood up A husband and wife should not live like adversaries in a boxing ring. Also, you can maybe discuss sharing household chores - the prophet pbuh used to do his own chores. Or not necessary then it becomes a problem. My question is: Men are in charge of women by [right of] what Allah has given one over the other and what they spend [for maintenance] from their wealth. . For a manual evaluation of a definite integral. in charge of the internal arrangement of the household, while Muslim men are Why in Islam a Wife Has to Obey her Husband? | About Islam No one looks at a person twice regardless of ones qualities they are more interested whats in the bank and what can I gain when I do marry her or him. So you need to be very clear about what you want in marriage life and go ahead .I think you are learning lot of lessons here so get yourself educated and before marriage make it clear to your wife what you want . Solving implicit function numerically and plotting the solution against a parameter. You are a little child. She must take the money without extravagance or waste if he does not give her what suffices her. Functional cookies help to perform certain functionalities like sharing the content of the website on social media platforms, collect feedbacks, and other third-party features. And I would hope to fullfill mine towards him. A man asking his wife for money is not seen as very honourable, especially if you are not struggling to pay the bills. And please do not go overboard with a topic on lavish lifestyles. father or failing to uphold ties with him and treat him kindly, in ways that Anyway, you may also want to see these two links below, InshaAllah. Financial Rights of Women - obligatory, or an appointed portion. Although it is true that in Islam a wife does not have to spend her money and it is the husbands responsibility to full fill the basic requirements of the family e.g rent, bills and etc. he who gives in charity is better than him who takes it). [Al-Bukhari and Muslim]. He should not be asked to spend what he cannot afford. This does not mean physical work on the part of the woman if a woman of her standing does not generally engage in physical work. This has to be settled, with witnesses, at the time of the marriage. This way, both husband and wife can concentrate on their marriage, kids, spending time together etc during their non-working hours. had excused her husband his mahr, but later demanded it, the husband should be They should both help each other out in every aspect of life. She can administer her financial issues as she wants. If you look at the hadiths and practices of the Prophet, you will not find anywhere that cooking and housework are mentioned as part of the obligations or duties of the wife. freedom and other payment was not required. That is very unfair and rude! will still desire to contribute to making things easier on them both, naturally. use that to uphold ties with his father in a way that will not adversely I agree if you are strong in Deen money factor will not bother much but it is very difficult to find such good people.. Starting the Prompt Design Site: A New Home in our Stack Exchange Neighborhood. And righteous women are devoutly obedient and, when alone, protective of what Allah has entrusted them with. [Quran, 4:34]. Rufaidah's field hospital tent became very famous during the battles and the Prophet used to direct that the casualties be carried to her.". Do not turn them out of their [husbands'] houses, nor should they [themselves] leave [during that period] unless they are committing a clear immorality. We must understand and support one another not compete against one another for our rights. If you agree for above scenario it will not benefit you and kids much . We live in a society where to acquire a house you need to put down deposits and gurantees and than to full fill the mortgage the joint income of the family is taken into consideration so if they have mutually agreed to buying a nice house and to afford it they both have to contribute than the answer to the question changes, similarly if a single income of a husband can only afford to send the children to a school that is not deemed ssuitable by both husband and wife and she is willing to contribute than it is perfectly fine.
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